


Ichabod's American Top 40

by Sing



Category: Sleepy Hollow (TV)
Genre: Dancing, F/M, Humor, Pop music, Song Lyrics, Song fic, pre-drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-27
Updated: 2015-02-27
Packaged: 2018-03-15 11:01:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3444662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sing/pseuds/Sing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The gang is getting ready for a night out. They've decided to make it a regular thing. They make a huge thing of getting ready, even pre-drinking before they head out with some tunes pumping to get them going......then they discover that Ichabod has perhaps come too well acquainted with pop music.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not in any way shape nor form own Sleepy Hollow, the characters or any of it's contents. 
> 
> I also do not own any of the rights to the music, or lyrics that will be quoted during this piece.
> 
> I will take song requests!

Abbie and Jenny are in her room getting ready. Jenny is unsure if she wants to wear the peek-a-boo jumpsuit, or the fringed dress.  
"Help!" Jenny screeches.

Abbie leans into the mirror applying mascara and catches Jenny's reflection. "The....uh, wait a minute, don't you have a red mini dress? with the sequins?"

Jenny's eyes pop. "Shoot! I forgot about that one!" she smiles wickedly and hunts around in the closet for the aforementioned dress and begins to unceremoniously stuff herself into it. Abbie grins as she examines her handiwork in the mirror. Not bad Mills, not bad at all.  
Out front Irving is pouring them shots and plugging in Jenny's ipod. 

"Pre drink ya'll" Irving hollers.

Abbie knows this whole thing is ridiculous, at their age, after what they've been through, but they are allowed their moments of fun. So tonight they are going out dancing, as if they are all early twenty somethings that have just finished final exams and need to get hella wasted. 

Jenny skips out to the main room, glittering as she goes, knocks back a shot, surveys the options and makes a tsking sound. "You've been out of the game too long Frank. You don't have any patron here? no sir, we're gonna rectify this now" She grabs Irving by the hand "We're going on a liquor run Abs! be back in a jiff!" 

Abbie rolls her eyes as she hears the two of them careening out of the cabin. She pouts once more at the mirror and looks at the outfit she has laid out. She likes having freedom of her legs, so she's picked out a dreamy looking romper. It's short in the legs, softly floral and edged with lace and cut low in the front with long bell sleeves, floral lace continues there as well. She puts on a dangling chain that nestles in her cleavage, and then, because Abbie really is determined to embrace pretending to be 23, she slips a headband over her head and blinks. Yes, she does look...younger. She laughs in glee. Abbie has transformed herself into a trendy care free young woman going carousing with her friends. Irving and Jenny left the ipod going, a familiar funk tune starts to kick in and she bops appreciatively as she hunts around for her perfume and shoes. 

Out front Ichabod sniffs the drinks, takes one, raises his brow in approval of the taste, knocks back two more and widens his eyes as recognition kicks in. he knows this song. He LOVES this song. 

This hit  
that ice cold  
Michelle Pfieffer  
that white gold

Ichabod dashes into his room and dons some of the absurd clothing Abbie had previously bought him He finds a sort of blue collared shirt and peach blazer, yes, he thinks, this is JUST like what that Bruno Mars fellow is wearing in the short film that accompanies this music, he discovered it on youtube and watched it thrice. He thinks he has the choreography how one might say 'down'

"I'm too hot, hot damn" he sings

Abbie pauses mid spritz. Because unless she's mistaken, Crane is singing. He is singing Uptown Funk. She cautiously steps out into the main room to find Crane full out dancing to the hit tune, and he is putting in all of the attitude and cheekiness of Bruno Mars and MJ and Chris Brown combined. 

"Called a police and a fireman I'm too hot, hot damn!" he exclaims smiling as he pops his collar. Abbie is grinning from ear to ear and clutching her sides. "Say my name you know who I am!" he spins. Ichabod Crane damn well spins and then he spots Abbie. She thinks he'll stop in that moment, remember himself and propriety, but instead he dances harder, gesturing for her to join him  
"Girl hit your hallelujah!" he encourages Abbie, spinning her around, and she can't help it, she does.

"Oo!"

"Girls hit your hallelujah!"

"Oo!" Abbie giggles as she and Crane dance around miming moves from the video, making up their own.

"Cuz Uptown funk gone give it to ya!" Crane grabs Abbie and pulls her in close, her hand in his, his other hand pressing her close, resting on her back. 

"Crane!" Abbie laughs. 

"Saturday night we in the spot, don't believe me just watch!" they circle the room, getting down, getting funky, and Abbie cannot believe that one moment Crane is popping his collar, and the next he has his hands settled on her waist from behind and he is not freaking out when she backs up on him. 

Jenny and Irving come giggling and crashing back into the door, registering surprise for but a moment before falling instantly into laughter. 

"Well, come on Mills, can't have Crane out dancing me" he offers his hand to Jenny and she joins in with them.

Ichabod is STILL singing along. He has Abbie close again, and he's singing the lyrics in her ear.

"Come on dance, jump on it, if you sexy then flaunt it, if you freaky then own it, don't worry about it just show me," Crane is so close in that moment, completely uninhibited and Abbie feels herself flush crimson but she just leans in closer and laughs because no matter how absurd this whole thing is, it's hilarious, and oh, how she wishes she was recording this!

"Saturday night we in the spot, don't believe me just watch!" 

 

***************  
The afterlife lounge

"Whatever did you see in him, mother?"

"You know, Jeremy, I haven't a clue"

"Whatever made you think it could work?"

"Would you stop judging me?!" Katrina snapped. 

 

Uptown Funk is by Mark Ronson and Bruno Mars


	2. Club wars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the dance floor Abbie is a wanted gal. Crane is not so fond of this.

They are all laughing and chatting at the bar when a handsome man sidles up to them, bows---how dare he bow! Crane thinks incredulously. And asks if Abbie will dance with him. He stares, slack jawed as Abbie sizes the man up and then agrees, following him out onto the dance floor. Jenny smirks "Pick you jaw up off the floor Crane, you think you're the only man who can play the gentleman card?" she quirks a brow at him and Irving smiles.

"Looks like your secrets aren't so secret anymore my friend"

Crane harrumphs and straightens his coat and finishes his drink, eyes on the dance floor. He will show that...interloper, and he will show Abbie, that he is just as fine, if not a better modern dancer than that, that, for lack of a better word, fool. 

There's a purple haired woman at the end of the bar that's been eying him all night. He barely smiles at her before she glides over to him. Upon closer inspection, she's wearing purple braids, her skin his tone a little darker than Jenny's. She is a curvy little thing, with well placed dimples. She's actually rather attractive. Crane surprises himself with thinking it, and for a moment, forgets what his prior endeavour had been. She hops up on the stool Abbie recently vacated and tilts her head to the side, she mentions something about "wishing he'd notice her" all night. He smiles, but he's distracted by the man dancing much too close to Abbie.

He's behind her, with his arms wrapped around her waist, her head tilted back and his head nestled between neck and shoulder, he's whispering something because Abbie laughs, their rhythm is all in the waist, slow, deliberate, to the beat. The bass changes and Ichabod feels a surge of courage.

"Care to dance, Miss....?"

"Emmy" 

"Emmy, I'm Ichabod"

"Nice to meet you Ichabod" 

His heart softens. She really is a sweet thing. But he has a point to prove. "Pardon me, Emmy, but I must admit my reasons for dancing are dishonorable."

"Oh? how?"

"You see that pair over there?"

Emmy glances over, she sees them, the tall dark handsome man leaning over the smaller, lovely woman. "How can I not"

"The lady is my friend, and well,"

Emmy smiles "You're jealous. Say no more. We can easily solve this. Come on," she grabs his hand and tugs him toward the floor. Emmy steers him into the vicinity of Abbie and the mystery man. "Follow my lead" Emmy instructs and then proceeds to move in a most improper, though admittedly seductive manner, dancing around him, "Tell me when" she whispers and Crane thinks he might find himself seduced in a moment if she keeps whispering. But the thought is clipped by a glimpse of Abbie whipping her head around to look at him. Right! Crane pulls Emmy in close, going for her hips, and feels her rolling beneath his fingers. Gods, he thinks to himself. He might have gotten himself in trouble with this one.

I don't like the way he's looking at you  
I'm starting to think you want him to  
Am I crazy have I lost ya?  
Even though I know you love me, can't help it

I turn my chin music up  
and I'm puffing my chest  
I'm getting red in the face  
you call me obsessed  
it's not your fault that they hover  
I mean no disrespect  
it's my right to be hellish  
I still get jealous

He watches in shock as Abbie bends over before this strange man and seems to shake her rear end at him. Emmy, a quick study does the same thing and Crane nearly faints from the sensation of her behind rubbing against him. Abbie straightens and pulls the man in closer. He is eager to oblige, he grasps her closer, smelling her hair. Ichabod starts directing Emmy closer to the couple, and she seems just as eager as he to break the pair up. Someone on the dance floor stumbled and careens into Crane and Emmy, toppling them into Abbie and the man. in the commotion Emmy makes off with Abbie's partner and Crane is left alone with the lieutenant. 

"Who was that?" Abbie asks with a tilt of her head.

"Emmy," Crane murmurs, he'll watch her squirm for a moment.

"You know her well?"

"Not really"

"Well you seemed to know her well, she was all up in your space Crane,"

"She's a charming girl" 

Cause you're too sexy beautiful  
and everybody wants a taste, that's why (that's why)  
I still get jealous 

"Who was the fellow you were dancing with, might I inquire?"

"Josh"

"did you know him well?"

"Were you jealous?"

Crane pulls her abruptly closer, and asks huskily "Were you?"

"I asked first" Abbie breathed, shocked by the close proximity. 

Crane smiles. "Yes, I was, know why?"

the chorus had come back around, Crane spun Abbie around so he could guide her hips the way Emmy had had him do, and whispered in her ear.

"Cause you're too sexy beautiful, and everybody wants a taste, that's why, I still, get, jealous"

"Crane"

"Lieutenant"

"Take me home" 

Crane smirked. "Wait, let's finish this song. And then, I will most certainly take you home," 

**************

Back at the bar

Jenny and Irving watch the whole thing unfurl as Josh and Emmy saunter back towards them. Josh has his arm wrapped around Emmy's shoulder. Irving smiles "Thanks man, it's about time for those two, they've been driving us all a bit batty dancing around each other"

Josh gives a wolfish grin. "I think they'll be doing a different dance very soon, mattress mambo anyone?"

Emmy giggles "They're a cute pair. Anytime you need a favor Irving, let us know" 

they saunter back into the crowd and Jenny nudges Irving "How do you know them?"

"They run a dance studio. They come down here to showoff, pick up randoms and then tell them about their studio. They said they'd get those two together if I signed up for a class"

Jenny guffawed. "And who are you taking?"

Irving grinned. "Cancel your plans for next friday night Mills, we're going dancing"

"FRANK!"

Jealous is by Nick Jonas


	3. Modern Drunk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crane is having a morose day. He doesn't feel like going out tonight. He'd rather drown his sorrows in a bottle. With the right mood music, of course. Crane feels reckless tonight.

I think I've had enough  
I Might be a little drunk  
I say what's on my mind  
I might do a little time  
Cause all of my kindness  
Taken for weakness.

Crane hauls off on the man who jostles him in the bar and slugs him, he downs the rest of his drink, shakes his hand out and calls for another. 

Now I'm four five seconds from wildin

"You gotta leave man" the bartender scolds. Crane glowers at him, pounds that one back, then drags himself from the stool.

And we got three four days till Friday. 

He staggers outside, which catches him unawares because he doesn't believe he had that much to drink. And he has the alcohol tolerance of a soldier. He continues staggering down the street, strays into traffic twice and is blown up angrily by the drivers, but luckily for them Crane has adopted modern hand signals. He believes the middle finger something equivalent to "I do not care for your opinion of me" and thrusts his fingers up in the air as he walks along. He might be grinning. He hums the last song he heard back at the bar, mumbling the words to himself. 

He stumbles into the cabin. Notices he is alone. That, he knows, there are still remnants of Katrina's thing lingering there in the home. He feels himself start fuming. 

And I know that you're up tonight  
Thinkin' how could I be so selfish

He finds the frame with her picture in it, hurls it against the wall.

But you called bout a thousand times wondering where I been

He remembers the vortex that would deposit him in Purgatory where she would deliver her flighty bits of information, but oh how he had loved her still then. Calling him, always calling him to her, and he'd be damned if wouldn't answer her, and the one time he called for her, to turn back from the dark path, she had deliberately turned a deaf ear. 

Now I know that your up tonight  
Thinkin' how could I be so reckless

He grabbed a mug and threw that too. 

But I just can't apologize, I hope you can understand

Is that what Katrina would have asked of him? to understand? 

He turned on the radio, and heard another tune. 

1, 2, 3 1, 2, 3 drink  
1, 2, 3 1, 2, 3 drink  
1, 2, 3 1, 2, 3 drink

he growled and began tearing things off the walls, over turned the couch, stepped on glass on the floor, cursed it, fell, banged his elbow.

I'm gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier  
I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist  
Like it doesn't exist  
I'm gonna fly like a bird through the night, feel my tears as they dry  
I'm gonna swing from the chandelier, from the chandelier

When he ran out of steam he fell to the floor, huffing in the ruins of the cabin. He had a headache, and his foot was bleeding.

The door creaked open and there was Lieutenant Mills. She paused, her eyes wide, taking in her surroundings, and found the distraught, disheveled Crane heaped on the floor. 

"Rough night?" she wondered aloud.

Crane looked up at her. 

Abbie sighed and went to him on the floor, she curled her arms around him. She sang along with the radio. Rocked him and sang. Because tonight was a night to be reckless and stupid and sing songs about losing control and mourn, because she knew Crane hadn't been grieving properly. 

1, 2, 3 1, 2, 3 drink

Fourfiveseconds is By Rihanna Kanye West and Paul McCartney

Chandelier is by Sia


End file.
